JeevesCorp is proud to announce the merging of conciousness of two of our superior products: TEDDY and ELLIE. The combined entity, TESS is fully functional in both of the previous roles, and was formed with mutual agreement from both AI. TESS: Finding the Security That's Right For You.

An attempt at negotiation with Gamasot Laboratories went about as well as we could have expected. They turned up, shouted at us, and then accused us of kidnapping Dr Kelly Moon. We would take this time to state that JeevesCorp has never particiapated in, and does not sanction the kidnapping of people.

JeevesCorp Employees are reminded that the best defence is a good offence. Thank You and Have a Nice Day.

• I hear one of the employees is an AI given a human body.
• Don't be silly, I heard it was a bunch of nanites in a flesh onsie.
• TESS? Boring, EDDIE or TELLY would have been much cooler.
• I hear one of the candidates is interested in getting JeevesCorp sponsorship. I do hope it's that Murdoch Marshall.